The horror of the synopsis

I couldn't believe it when I looked at my phone this morning and realised it was March 1st. I mean, really. What happened to January and February? Where did they go?

Was my first thought connected to St David's Day? No. My first thought was "Oh, my sweet *?!!!* - deadline month."

Deadly Shadows has to be on my editor's desk by the end of this month. Yikes. It's written, it's reasonably polished but - give me strength - I have the dreaded synopsis to write. I would rather have my teeth pulled without anaesthetic. Okay, that's a lie (and my dentist might stumble across this blog). But I really, really hate writing a synopsis. I've never yet found a way to write them so that they sound vaguely interesting. I've never yet discovered how to prevent myself from using the 'meanwhile' word fifty times. What I tend to do is write a single sentence that sums up each chapter. Thankfully my chapters are fairly short. There are forty-five of the blighters in Deadly Shadows. When I have forty-five disjointed sentences, I try - and usually fail spectacularly - to breathe a little life into them. Ah well, I have a month to write the dratted thing. I also have the other necessities - wine, whisky and chocolate.

 Life isn't all bad though. A dear friend sent me a copy of this:


If you haven't read it, you must. Truly. Needless to say, I'm tempted to forget the synopsis and sit and read all day but, so far, I've resisted. The night before last, I decided I'd just read one more chapter before I went to sleep. The result was that I was crying with laughter when I was trying to sleep. I was still laughing when I was out with the dogs yesterday. (A funny incident with a tap.) Last night, I read a couple of chapters and decided I'd just read one more before I went to sleep. Oh, my. The same thing happened. I was howling with laughter again. (An incident on a train.) A wonderful read. The Horse With My Name is a wonderfully well written book with a great storyline and real laugh out loud humour.

Here's the blurb:

Dan Starkey - international man of inaction - rides again. How far can he fall this time?

Ex-journalist Dan Starkey is stuck in a grimy Belfast bedsit. His life is a disaster, and his only solace is the pub round the corner. He needs to get out more, particularly since the sessions at Relate with his wife Patricia have been cancelled and she's hooked up with new man Clive. Fellow ex-journalist Mark Corkery, whose secret persona is The Horse Whisperer, an internet horse-racing gossip, wants him to investigate Geordie McClean, the man behind Irish American Racing. Simple enough for a man with Dan's experience, surely? But Trouble is Dan's middle name. And trouble is what he finds...

Brilliant! Aw, I have the most wonderful friends.

So it's time I tackled this synopsis. See you on the other side.

Have a great weekend, all. And happy St David's Day to my Welsh friends!

© Shirley Wells 2016